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Thursday, November 11, 2004
10 funny things to do or say on a blind date ...
1. "Pretty...mine...yum!"
2. Wear bug spray as cologne (if you're a boy) or take a bath in heavy perfume (if your a girl)
3. Ask to "borrow" an old friend's children, then show up for your date pretending that they are your own.
4. When told where your blind date goes to school, say that that is where your kids went last year, too.
5. Belch enormously then immediately reach for a kiss.
6. Give your blind date a box of chocolates that have all been nibbled on.
7. If he/she asks your ambition in life, tell him/her that you want to be a Zen monk.
8. Paint a face on an egg and make hair for it, and bring it on the date. Whenever your blind date tries to say something, cradle your egg and whisper "shh! My baby is sleeping."
9. Chomp down on gum during the whole date, if you stop to eat, put your gum behind your ear and ask the waiter if he/she can bring you some more gum.
10. Draw a face on your finger and make the finger talk for you.
Chilled at 09:25 pm by blackberries
Sunday, October 31, 2004
How to get over being dumped ...
Virtually everyone has been dumped at some time in their life. I know I have and I know how much it hurts. Rejection is like a severe pain something twisting your insides. You may even feel nausea, headaches and even sickness. You may even find that for some reason you are subject to every cold and bug within a mile of you. Picking up the pieces is very tough. You will wish that your life could go back to the way it was before he left and you will live in hope that he will return. You may even feel that no body will ever want you and that you will never find love again. This is of course nonsense but you will not realize it until the day you are finally over him.
So, how can you get over the pain? How can you learn to live again? How can you stop feeling that you are unlovable and unwantable and that fate has marked you out for a lifetime of solitude, misery and bad luck? How can you start to enjoy your new single life and start to have some fun?
The first step:
You have to realize that he is not coming back to you. This is a painful process and it doesn`t matter whether you are young and have lost the boy of your dreams or you are a 40 year old who has been left by her philandering husband of 20 years. The healing process is still the same.
Remember that you will get over him. It might not seem like that right now but believe me in time you will.
Cry:
Let it all out. You may cry for a day, a week even a month or two and when the crying stops you will know you are half way there.
Talk:
Talk to your friends and family. Talk about your ex until you have no words left to say. You will know you are getting better when you are bored with the subject yourself.
Get angry:
Shout, yell, scream even punch a pillow (don`t punch anyone though as you can end up in serious trouble.) Let all your anger out. Then take 5 minutes to calm yourself down by taking some deep breathes and not moving. You will feel much better at letting all your anger out and feel even better once you are calm.
Look after yourself:
You may be off your food, not sleeping properly, over drinking, smoking generally not looking after yourself. With all the added stress this will begin to show. Take long, hot scented baths, play music that helps you to let your feelings out and allow other people to get close to you and to care for you.
Chilled at 09:36 pm by blackberries
Friday, October 29, 2004
Mrs. Ferrara comes to visit her son Anthony for dinner, who lives with a female roommate Vikki. During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty Anthony's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious..
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Anthony and his roommate than met the eye.
Reading his mom's thoughts, Anthony volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Vikki and I are just roommates."
About a week later, Vikki came to Anthony saying, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver sugar bowl.
You don't suppose she took it, do you?"
Anthony replied, " Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure." So he sat down and wrote:
Dear Momma,
I'm not saying that you 'did' take the sugar bowl
from my house, I'm
not saying that you 'did not' take it. But the fact
remains that it
has been missing ever since you were here for
dinner.
Love,
Anthony
Several days later, Anthony received a response email from his Momma which read:
Dear Son,
I'm a not saying that you 'do' sleep with Vikki,
and
I'm not saying
that you 'do not' sleep with her. But the fact
remains that if she was
sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have
found
the sugar bowl by now.
Love,
Momma
~ Lesson - Don't Lie to Your Mother...
I may be a tease, But I am not a bitch 
Chilled at 12:50 am by blackberries
Funny Things To Do While Buying Underwear ...
1. Pick up a pair and simply say, "Do think these will look good for the show tonight?".
2. Have you and a friend be in one coat together and say to the other, "Do you think we could both fit in this size?"
3. Ask if these (underwear) come with free femine hygine products.
4. Go up to a worker and say."Do you know if you have of those Sumo wresler things that they wear on the sale rack?"
Nyahhhhhh!!!!
Chilled at 12:27 am by blackberries
Wednesday, October 27, 2004
4 SIGNS SHE'S INTERESTED IN U!
Men hate to get rejected by women. There's nothing worse than having your ego smashed to little pieces when the woman of your (wet) dreams turns you down for a date. You really thought she was interested, but somehow you must have misread her signals...So what most guys are looking for is a set of clear signals that a woman is definitely warm for their form....
1- She's "in your face"
All of a sudden, you'll become aware of her presence everywhere -- she "just happens" to show up wherever you hang out, or you keep passing her in the hallway at work, or she "accidentally" bumps into you, or she maneuvers to stand close to you at a club.
2- She's got the right moves
An old saying goes, "Bodies don't lie." Nature has programmed humans with a complex set of non-verbal flirting signals that just flow spontaneously when they're interested. These range from the widening of the iris when looking at the object of desire to more overt displays such as smiling or touching.
- Pointing in your direction with her leg, foot, or shoulders
Leaning toward you while talking
Playing with or tossing her hair
Fondling a piece of jewelry (like an earring) or stroking the stem of her glass (big clue here!)
Keeping her eyes locked on you while she talks or drinks
Smiling when you check out her body
3- She's never too busy
This is the most cardinal rule of the dating game: if a woman is interested in going out with you, she will make herself available. This means that she will give you a work number or e-mail address. She will answer or return your call quickly. She will accept your invitation to get together -- and if she's busy on the day you specify, she will say something like, "Well, I can't this Saturday, but next Saturday would be fine, if that's okay."
4- She uses "The Probe" on you
"The Probe" is the female tool for ascertaining the level of a man's financial resources. It takes the form of seemingly casual questions, but behind it a ruthless calculator is ticking away. So when a woman first meets a man she might be interested in dating, she will quiz him on his job, where he lives, what kind of car he drives, all within the confines of what appears to be a natural conversation. If you give the "right" answers, then the flirting signals will follow; but if you aren't up to her "standards," she's gone in a cloud of dust.
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Chilled at 02:22 am by blackberries
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I love to love ....
Im passionate and loving ..
I know what I want and I always go for it ...
I live, I laugh, I love ....
For whatever its WORTH!!!
I want to stare into your eyes and never look away; I want you to hold me in your arms and tell me it's okay; I want to kiss with a passion that only we can share, and when it all falls down I want you to be there....
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Passion is not having sex; it's making love forever ...
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